Powerful Song, Powerful SiStars!

I know i am super late, but i just recently had the opportunity to see the 5th Annual Black Girls Rock Awards, which was hosted by my girl, Nia Long. It was originally aired on BET late fall of 2010.

I must say, this is the best awards show that i have seen in a very long time. It was not your average awards show. This show was powerful and had so much meaning. Empowering and honoring women of color for every generation and different genres. From Missy Elliott, to KeKe Palmer and Major General Marcelite J. Harris, amongst the many. Listening to the words of wisdom from Ilyana Vanzant and Ruby Dee, gave me chills all through my body. "The word 'Legendary' beginning with the word Leg. We are the Legs. If given the opportunity, we are the legs that will hold up the next generation." we're the words from Ruby Dee. "Black girls rock because we have to. So that our grandmothers know they didnt die for no reason, we will rock." Were the powerful words of Ilyana Vanzant.

The hightlight of the night for me was the Nina Simone “four women” song by Kelly price, Marsha ambrosius, Jill scott and Ledisi, which all happen to be my favorites. A song with poignant words that pierce the skin of black women with many shades, Nina’s song was an analysis of the status of women during her time (nina was born in 1933 and died in 2003)and to me, a song that is still clearly relevant today. It reaffirms our struggle against the idea that black women are anti-woman, anti-feminine, our exploitation and objectivity and fierce defiance at times.

Til this day, Nina is able to paint the pain of heartache through her songs often always saving the most dramatic stroke for the climax as she did with the last version of "Four Women" that depicts a woman by the name of Peaches who has been done so wrong in her life. On the surface, which is the wrong way to listen to such a song, you just see someone named “Peaches”, an “angry black woman”, but look deeper and you’ll see the meaning behind such a genius verse.

my skin is black
my arms are long
my hair is woolly
my back is strong
strong enough to take the pain
inflicted again and again
what do they call me
my name is AUNT SARAH
my name is Aunt Sarah

my skin is yellow
my hair is long
between two worlds
i do belong
my father was rich and white
he forced my mother late one night
what do they call me
my name is SAFFRONIA
my name is Saffronia

my skin is tan
my hair is fine
my hips invite you
my mouth like wine
whose little girl am I?
anyone who has money to buy
what do they call me
my name is SWEET THING
my name is Sweet Thing

my skin is brown
my manner is tough
i’ll kill the first mother I see
my life has been too rough
i’m awfully bitter these days
because my parents were slaves
what do they call me
my name is PEACHES

Happy New Year!!! (Late you say?!?!...NOPE!)

Yeah I said it....HAPPY NEW YEAR and i am in the month of March. Most people typically celebrate the new year in January, but me on the other hand, celebrate on my born day. Granted, it's still in a new year, but i was born on March 12, 1979 at 5am and that is when life begin for me, so when better to celebrate newness?!?!

So no, i didnt make a new years resolution, but i did, however decide that i will continue to strive towards greatness and to live life to its fullist. I mean, you only get one of them. I dont want to live to work. I want to work to live and be alive. By saying that, one of my favorite quotes from Nicki Minaj, "But to live doesn't mean youre alive." I'll let you digest that.

Anyway, to start out my new year, i did it with a bang. Not the unusual, but something that i love to do and what liberates me?! Guessed it yet?!!? Probably since you already peaked at the picture below. hahaha! I shaved my hair off. Ahhh...and it felt so good.



Some may not understand why i do it, so here is a brief explanation...

For years, i was told i was a pretty girl, but i never believed it because i was teased so badly growing up. From my skinny long legs, to my deep chocolate complexion and my over bite that took over my small framed face, i was convinced all these things made me ugly. Being teased from kids in school is one thing, but then to have it come from your family, the people you love and trust is another. For years, i trusted what they said about me and i didnt believe i was beautiful nor waas i comfortable in my own skin. So i hid from everyone with silence. I tried at every cost to make myself invincible until one day....

One day, i was walking through the mall, 3 months pregnant, feeling miserable, sick and depressed about living in a foreign place (VA opposed to FL). As i was walking with my head down, a guy (or you can say girl if you know what i mean) and a girl where walking past me, and with such conviction and genuine context he said, "she is GORGEOUS!" i lifted my head and looked to see who he was talking about and to my surprise, they were both looking at me and smiling. It may seem simple, but to have a total stranger make such a statement took me by surprise.

I went home, looked in the mirror and cried because i still couldnt see what they saw. To fast forward, a couple of years went by. i picked up an Essence magazine from the grocery store and read an article by the comedian and Grammy winning actress Monique, who talked about the hard times she went through in life. She said one statement that stood out to me and i have kept it with me ever since..."I deserve to love me!" She wrote it on her mirror in her bathroom and said it every morning until she begin to believe it in her heart and her soul. I decided to do the same thing, but i did it a little differently. I wanted to go back to that little girl that was told she was not beautiful, so i shaved my hair off with no hesitation. I wanted to see what i looked like completely naked. That turned my life around and i begin to love myself and more than i ever thought possible.

So with that...Happy New Year! Loving myself...everything about me and striving for excellence. xoxoxo!!!